Anxiety and Perfectionism – a toxic duo

Anxiety and Perfectionism are Petty Tyrants

If you’re anxious, have you ever noticed how perfectionism tends to amp up your anxiety? If you’re a perfectionist and something isn’t done perfectly, does it make you feel anxiety-ridden, like you’ve failed and everyone will know and see? That’s what I mean by petty tyrants. The energy is toxic, and consumes the space that could be filled with acceptance, joy, calm and clarity. If I had $5 for every client who chose to use the CLEAR skills to resolve anxiety and/or perfectionism, I’d be a gaJILLionaire!!

Let’s be CLEAR: anxiety and perfectionism suck.

It undermines clarity, calm, peace, and the ability to be present. Perfectionism also sucks. It’s an impossible standard, feeds anxiety, lowers self esteem, and makes you feel like you’ll never measure up.

Now, let’s also be CLEAR: energy healing is not typically a ‘One and Done’ solution for anxiety and perfectionism.

Energy clearing is typically iterative. Patterns like anxiety and perfectionism tend to be layered on over time. When people take medication to manage anxiety, it’s not unusual for them to need to up their dosage, or switch medications as whatever they’re taking loses effectiveness. And of course, those medications are suppressing symptoms, not resolving the problem.

It’s takes commitment and effort to move through and beyond the anxiety and perfectionism. They’re patterns that activate and run the show. Know this: self-healing doesn’t need to be laborious. Developing a practice of 15-20 minutes, several times a week, will go a long way toward helping you resolve a chronic pattern and move into new ways of being and new responses to your experiences and interactions.

The Present of Presence and CLEAR skills shift anxiety and perfectionism patterns through intentional focus on chakra regulation and clearing the energy that holds the patterns in place.

Compilation story about Anxiety and Perfectionism

Because of the pervasiveness of anxiety and perfectionism, rather than telling one person’s story, I’ve created a compilation of many stories that I’ve heard and witnessed people resolve over the past 30 years.

A Powerful Intention:

I am calm, clear, patient and accepting, participating consciously in my life and experiences.

The Basic Story:

I’ve always felt like I needed to excel, do everything perfectly. I made myself crazy in grade school and high school, aiming for the A, beating myself up if I got an A-, or made simple mistakes.

My parents had high expectations for me, and I felt subtly (or overtly) criticized if my grades, behaviors, relationships weren’t absolutely perfect. I internalized the belief  that I’d never get it right, never be good enough, no matter how hard I tried.

As an adult, anything I do that is less than perfect leaves me feeling raw, unworthy, and anxious about how others see me. I intellectually know that being perfect is impossible. But I feel like I have to be perfect anyway! And it keeps me churning with anxiety. Truth be told, it’s exhausting.

I seem to have a lot of friends who are anxious, too. They have social, work and/or performance anxiety. They’re anxious about their bodies, age, imperfections. If their children don’t get into the best school, or if someone stops by unexpectedly and their house isn’t pulled together, it reinforces their anxiety & lack of worth.

Tools for (r)evolution:

To work on the anxiety/perfectionism cycle, start with chakra settings, specifically the 2nd chakra. You’re taking on other people’s anxiety in the attempt to sense what people want from you, so you can deliver it perfectly – to get the A! Backing out of that pattern is an enormous relief, I call it ‘stopping the madness’, but you’ll still need to deal with clearing the anxiety and the drive for perfection.

Energy clearing is a gradual, incremental unwinding process to let go of old ways of operating and a gradual, incremental rewinding into new behaviors. The process is organic, you don’t have to force anything, rather, the new you emerges, unfolds.

You may still feel anxious from time to time, or find yourself wanting things to be perfect. But you’ll know that’s an old story, and you’ll clear the energy away. Relax, let go and do the best you can without stressing every detail. It’s so freeing to let yourself off of the perfectionism hook! Imagine experiencing other emotions, like peace, contentment and clarity!

Thoughts & Insights

Anxiety and perfectionism often go hand-in-hand. The trick is to notice what you’re feeling and stop. Just stop. Then, take a minute or two to clear the energy.

If you’re feeling the pressure to do everything immaculately, clear perfectionism. If you’re feeling stressed, uneasy, amped up, clear anxiety. If you’re feeling both – clear them both!

Taking the few moments to notice and observe, stop, clear and reset is an essential step in breaking ANY pattern. EHI calls it the Formula for Evolution. Without observation, it’s tough to see how you engage the patterns and let them run your life.

Let me ask you:

What might it feel like to let the anxiety and perfectionism cycle fade to black? What do you imagine it would be like to spend your days actively choosing how you participate and interact, instead of being driven by the impulse to always get the A, and anxious that you might not? Do you feel ready to let this go, without having all the answers of about how you’ll feel when you do? Because sometimes you have to take the leap and make the shift to discover how great life can be!

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[The skills and tools referenced in this post are from two online courses that EHI offers to the consciously curious. The Present of Presence is a free, 1-hour engagement with two foundational skills for energy regulation and embodiment. CLEAR is a self-paced, online course that offers a series of skills, for energetic self-care, and for clearing and releasing patterns, themes and behaviors that inhibit authentic presence and in the moment choice.]

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