Remember Dana Carvey as Church Lady and that line from Saturday Night Live? It went viral before we knew what it meant to go viral. Want to hear it again?
Let’s reframe that line just a bit into, Well, Aren’t You Special. Why? Because it works for the post, that’s why. Moving on…
A friend of mine has a lot of allergic sensitivities. Candle shops are a problem – all those essential oils! Massage therapists can’t use any type of scented oil, in fact, my friend brings her own oil with her for the therapist to use.
She’s also got other sensitivities, too. Certain types of people, places and activities activate her sensitivity, and she moves into reaction; generating a lot of noise and commentary that tends to spotlight her and her ‘issues.’
Her life is pretty limited these days. She’s had a hard time making her career come together – in fact, she is usually between gigs, looking for ‘the passion’ that’s going to inspire her so her life can thrive.
I love her. She drives me crazy. Why?
Don’t get me wrong. These sensitivities are a real issue. She’s not making them up. I’ve seen her when her allergies flare. She can take in a whiff or two of a scented candle and in 15 seconds flat her nose is completely clogged and she begins breathing in wheezy gasps. It’s awful and I feel a lot of compassion for how difficult it is for her.
But, really. She drives me crazy.
Here’s why. Because somehow in the process of having all of these issues arise over time, she has internalized them in such a way that they now define her. She IS her clogged nose. She IS her sensitivities. She IS her inability to hang out in large groups. She IS the amalgam of what she can’t eat.
And somehow, because of all of the things she has to watch out for, avoid, ingest in very small doses, she’s making herself SPECIAL. And she’s hijacking everyone else’s experience by making her sensitivities everyone’s agenda.
Here’s the thing:
You can be SPECIAL without being enrolled in your stuff – even your shitty stuff does not have to define you or be the part of you that is most available in relationship.
So what to do, oh sensitive ones?
Own your bigness. Write a list of ALL of your attributes, qualities, accomplishments, achievements and successes. Read every one of the items on the list and grok them. Take them in at the cellular level and own them as Who You Are. (That’s grokking.)
Remember that energy flows where attention goes. If you focus on all that is wrong, then that is what you will have. All That Is Wrong. All The Time.
Recognize that oftentimes what we hold in our minds as afflictions in the body are little more than unexamined, unprocessed emotions that have been somatized into the body. Oftentimes these afflictions are difficult to manage medically because they aren’t actually medical.
When the root of these afflictions meet the light of conscious awareness, the body frequently expels the stuck, somatized energy and heals.
So know that you’re special. Truly special. And what makes you special is not what’s wrong with you. What makes you special is what’s right with you. That’s the stuff that makes me smile at the idea of being with you. That gets my heart singing and my mind humming with things I want to talk about, share and do with you.
And keep your vital, oh so special energy flowing!